This just in. Ariel will be a Negro. Wypipo unhappy. Film at 11.

Wypipo complaining about Ariel being black be like…

In case you haven’t heard, in Disney’s continued campaign to milk every last dollar they can from their bountiful supply of animated classics, they will be making a live action version of the beloved 1989 smash hit, “The Little Mermaid.”

© Disney. All rights reserved.

This is by far one of this blerd’s favorite Disney animated films (and I can neither confirm nor deny I used to sing “Part of Your World” with my daughter when she was 9). When released 30 years ago, it single-handedly resuscitated Disney’s dying animation division.

And you just know that people on social media took this move in stride and responded with decency, measured commentary, and sheer jubilation. (Cough, cough, bullsh*t).

Oh…my…gosh darn, have some wypipo lost it on this one. The audacity and unmitigated gaul for Disney to cast such a classic character as a sista is preposterous. Why everyone knows that mermaids are really white! (Have you ever seen a black mermaid? Of course not! Scientifically speaking, being that they live under the sea, mermaids should be pale. Amirite?)

The List

Now, I’m not saying that wypipo complaining about Ariel being black is silly, buuuuuut…

wypipop complaining about Disney casting a black girl as Ariel be like…

…Bill Gates complaining about the gov’ment giving food stamps to those on welfare.

…Taylor Swift complaining about Twitter founder Ev Williams retweeting someone and giving them a thousand more followers.

…Meryl Streep complaining about the Academy giving Adam Sandler an Oscar nomination.

…Americans complaining about the audacity of Canada to win the NBA championship.

…Stephen King complaining about Harper Collins giving me a book deal (they haven’t, but if they’re interested, give a brutha a call.)

What other analogies can you think of? Hit me up in the comments, on Twitter, and/or Facebook


Also published on Medium.

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