The Temporal Consternation Corollary of the Racism-v-White Privilege Proof

Wherein I provide you with a mathematical formula for calculating the probability and speed with which a Trump supporter alerted of their privilege will relent.

Not too long ago, I shared with you a simple mathematical proof to share with all Trump supporters and any fragile wypipo insulted when alerted to their white privilege. As I shared in that post, they will often interpret your recognition of their privilege as an accusation of racism.

It is my sincere desire that the Racism-v-White Privilege Proof can be a beacon of hope and light in what can otherwise be an untoward discourse that can quickly devolve into real insults, ad hominem attacks, and name calling.

To recap:

  • FACT #1: white privilege exists.
  • FACT #2: ALL white people benefit from it.
  • FACT #3: NOT all white people are racists.
  • FACT #4: Facts 1-3 may be too complicated for Trump supporters to comprehend.

Part of that original proof also included two experiments where you 1) attempt to explain to a Trump supporter why a square is a rhombus but a rhombus isn’t necessarily a square, and 2) explain to aTrump supporter what a rhombus is.

We can see from the above mathematical proof, that while the correlation between white privilege and actually being a racist a-hole may belong to the same mathematical genus, the number of occurrences of the latter are not statistically significant to conclude there is 100% equivalency.

Assuming the Trump supporter you’re engaging is actually able to grasp the statistical and geometric metaphorical comparison, one should expect their level of consternation and insult to be inversely proportional to their level of comprehension.

We can now create a formula that should be able to accurately predict within 0.765 milliseconds, the amount of time it takes a Trump supporter to be made at ease that you are not actually calling him or her a racist when you acknowledge their white privilege. Wherein:

  • c = their level of comprehension of the aforementioned proof
  • i = their initial level of insult and consternation when alerted to their privilege
  • f = their final level of insult and consternation after explaining the above proof
  • r = the number of racially insensitive comments they’ve made in the course of any given conversation or social media exchange
  • t = the number of memes praising Donald Trump they have shared or posted in the past 168 hours

Taking the aforementioned variables, we arrive at this formula:

f = ( i x tr ) / c

Ah. Such a simple formula, but it says so much. If you recall from high school algebra (or college algebra if, like me, you were a late math bloomer), the bigger your denominator c is, the lower the final level of consternation and insult.

As one can plainly see, it will take a considerable level of comprehension on the part of your fragile or Trump-supporting friend to counter-affect any previous examples of racism or racial insensitivity they’ve shared. Even just a few racist or racially insensitive remarks will exponentially increase the level anger and consternation fragile wypipo or Trump supporters will have when you acknowledge their privilege.

So, at the end of the day, what does this all mean? Well, unless you are dealing with a veritable saint, or have come across a unicorn of a Trump supporter that actually has patience, empathy, and understanding, you’re f’ed, the conversation is doomed, and there’s probably absolutely no point in going any further in your discussions.

Isn’t math fun?

About “Ronald”
Ron Dawson (aka “Ronald”) is a satirical writer, filmmaker, self-admitted blerd, managing editor of a major filmmaking blog, and author of the pending satirical memoir “Dungeons ‘n’ Durags: One black nerd’s epic quest of self-discovery, racial identity, and woking up in Trump’s America.” Sign up for the email list to get access to a sample chapter and be notified of the book’s release.

Also published on Medium.

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